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It’s Christmas!

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On Christmas Eve each year, we do a few of the same things. We eat pasta soup, drive around town to look at the Christmas lights, have Christmas ice cream, and the boys open one present – just like we did when I was a kid. The boys almost always choose to open their presents from each other (my sister and I chose the biggest ones, but not my kids, they think they pick out the best ones for each other). This year, Sam didn’t have anything to open since Ben is building his present over the winter, so they opened their joint presents from Uncle Brian – just as exciting. After checking the Santa tracker, they get tucked in for sugar plums dancing in their heads. At 14 and 10, the tradition continues.

Christmas morning doesn’t sound like footie pajamas pitter-pattering down the hallway anymore but I can’t say it isn’t just as sweet, though slightly more violent, to have two giant boys and two large dogs crashing into our bed saying “get up! get up! it’s time!”

I always start by getting breakfast in the oven which to the kids is infuriatingly slow no matter how quickly I get it going. So, this year Ben helped with the egg bake (the one Jeff’s mom makes) to speed up the process. It was nice to have him in the kitchen with me and really did help move things along. Cinnamon Rolls and eggs in the oven, coffee in hand, pictures quickly taken by the tree – it was present time!

Sam has the best expressions when opening presents. I could watch him all day. Each one is the greatest thing he has ever seen and the thing he has always wanted, small or large, he gets so excited. His aunt Niki always says “that kid lives his life like an exclamation mark”. Sometimes I have a sneaking suspicion this is when he is getting really loud, but I still love it, because I think she also sees him living a life full of excitement, with a really big heart, and like everything is just the greatest thing he has ever seen.

Ben is more subtle, a lot more so. But if you watch around the teenage sarcasm and the way he has always been like a little wolf hiding his food, emotions, protecting his pack… you get to see the smiles that form at the corners of his mouth and eyes when something touches him. If you sit back, he sometimes will come to share it with you. Our boys couldn’t be any less alike. It is fascinating to watch them grow into these people.

Jeff and I had gifts as well. The highlights of which were some future adventures. I am so excited to have a camp shower. I was on the verge of tears I was so thrilled. This makes booking campsites so much easier if we don’t have to worry about showering. We love getting to stay in the National Parks and one of the biggest downfalls is that they don’t have any means of showering. Problem solved. I gave Jeff an adventure date, which we have been meaning to do more of, in hopes this would start a trend. It’s a bike rail gift card for next spring. We are going to pedal the railroad in Boone, IA. I think he is looking forward to it.

We spent the rest of Christmas day talking to relatives, playing with our new gifts, and eating. We made brisket, veggies, and gravy and had some of Jeff’s mom’s homemade bread. Sam requested french silk pie, so we bought one (I was not going to take that on after all the treats we made). And Sam and I decided to take out the fancy dinnerware for once. We finished out the last of our Christmas movies and Jeff had to concede that not the entire list was going to be completed this year – it was long.

Sam said it was his best Christmas yet. I love hearing those words. We are doing our best to give them traditions that are special and meaningful to our family. We are doing our best to give them our time together. We make room for friends and family, for sharing, laughing, celebrating, and enjoying the seasons.

We hope you all had a very Merry Christmas.

Winter Break and a Snowstorm

Winter Break and a Snowstorm

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On the third weekend of December, my schedule gave to me, a snowstorm and winter break. We actually started the weekend by having Jeff’s parents down. We went to Dome after Dark at the Botanical Center which has become one of my favorite things to do there. One of the boys characterized it as “super chill” and I think that is an apt description. They turn down the lights and have a color-changing glow on the plants. There are lanterns on tables, snacks, and lo-fi music playing. It’s incredibly relaxing.

The miniature trains were also out in the gardeners’ show house which all my guys love to see. This year there was a Japanese theme since the Botanical Center has been recently focusing on Asian Heritage. They celebrated Governor Ray welcoming refugees to our state and the cultural richness it gave to the area. I was really disappointed to have missed these events and hope the Ray Way Celebration is something the Botanical Center continues. I believe we will attend in the future. It looked like something that would be of great interest to us and many others.

We spent the rest of the weekend together with Jeff’s parents, watching Sam play basketball, going to a shop Jeff’s mom and I both have shopped at for each other online but hadn’t yet made it to in person – and we all found stuff we liked there! We enjoyed meals together, exchanged gifts, and played games.

The following week, Christmas break started for the boys and the weather took a turn for the worse. The windchills reached nearly -40 with the Real Feel in the -50s. We knew it was coming and had our groceries ready. We had all our Christmas shopping done. So, we were able to stay inside and spent most of the time baking treats for the neighbors as planned, which also helped to keep the house warmer. Sam had a day before the temperatures dipped too low he was able to play outside with a neighbor friend, and he bundled up to brave the weather to make gingerbread houses with that same friend on one of the really cold days. The dogs snuggled by the fire and we watched Christmas movies under blankets, wrapped presents with space heaters close by, and drank warm drinks until Christmas.

Christmas Time Together

Christmas Time Together

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A few years ago we discovered the Holiday Promenade in the East Village of Des Moines. On that first night, the shops opened late with sales. There were carolers on the corner serving hot cocoa. And the ice skating rink had its opening night with Christmas tree lighting and an appearance from the big guy in the red suit. They pulled off a pretty magnificent evening and we were hooked.

As the East Village has swelled in size over the years, so too has the resplendence of the Promenade. There are horse-drawn carriage rides, performance art, a reindeer and sleigh, ornament and wreath-making nights, snacks, Santa and the Grinch, and fireworks. I adore visiting this event as often as possible during the month leading up to Christmas. So, the second weekend of December, that is how we spent our Friday night.

Ben wanted to make gingerbread houses with a friend. So, Sam, Jeff, and I went to the Holiday Promenade. Sam and I especially delight in the mid-century modern luxuries of West Elm, so he spent some time trying out all of the chairs (and fur blankets – the kid knows his way around comfort). We shopped for a couple of gifts in the shops and then checked out the artist for the night: a display of interactive orbs which when you shined a light on them and then on your face it projected you and your background larger than life onto the orb. It was eery and fun. There were carolers on our lighted walk back up to the horse-drawn carriage where we ran out of time to catch a ride because Ben got done early. Sam got to say a quick, “Hello” to one of the horses and we vowed not to miss this next year.

Saturday was a sports day. Sam had basketball and baseball. We squeezed in some time at the library, however, where we checked out a few books and we always find things to purchase at Novel Findings. It is seriously such a steal to purchase things in that area. I shouldn’t be allowed to go in there. I am the worst kind of book hoarder – I absolutely think I can read them all.

Sunday afternoon was the big one. We surprised the boys with tickets to the Santa Express. We purchased these the day they were released and had them on the calendar all year. We have been going on this train since the boys were very small but missed going during covid and figured this was pushing it as their last year. They were game but I could tell they were on the edge of “are we too old for this?” Once they settled in, they seemed to enjoy the ride just as they always had, and Jeff and I soaked it in knowing it would likely be our last – well at least with the boys, maybe we could ride it ourselves, or if someone wants to loan us their kids.

I think there’s something to that. I miss a lot of the things we do together. I miss them being small. I miss their little faces lighting up with big smiles and looking to me for encouragement, confirmation, or just out of sheer joy, but a lot of times – I just really liked doing this stuff and it seems kind of boring to go to the zoo or the science center or on a Santa train without them. I think if I showed up at Storytime I might get some weird looks. But I really like doing that stuff. I know I’m supposed to be an adult doing adulty things and I sometimes do, but I really liked doing stuff that kids do with my kids. They don’t always like to anymore. So, we soak in these last moments and act like weirdos trying to figure out how to be the kids we are in the grown-up bodies we have.

On the Santa Express, there is singing, a story, cookies, and chocolate milk. We take the train to the North Pole. When we get there the conductor comes on and punches our tickets in a silly way and just behind him, Santa and Mrs. Claus (does she have a name?) come on the train. They stop for each child taking their wishlist and handing each one a bell – like the Polar Express (but different due to copyrights). Then we all wave goodbye to the Clauses and head back over the big bridge singing and telling jokes to the station.

I love this tradition. The drafty old train with the cheesy story and jokes. The cookies and Christmas lights. I get a little sad every time one of these things ends, knowing we are getting a little further from babyhood, a little closer to them moving away. My brother reminded me recently that right after Ben was born, I was on a lot of meds for pre-eclampsia I do not remember this, but I said to Aric, “he’s going to leave me one day”. Aric laughed about it. It does seem a funny thing to say at that moment. I remember feeling so overwhelmed with a love I didn’t know I could feel that I didn’t ever want it to leave. It scared me. I am spending my days trying to hold things more loosely, not grasping at attachments, finding ways to love and let go and grieve the things that pass, feel the sadness and let it go. Teenagers really make you feel that. They simultaneously can love so big, push so hard at limits, and pull for their individualism. It is a strange land to stand in, loving a teenager. I have a lot of gray hair lately.

But this is a story about Christmas time. And we had a great weekend savoring the time we had together.

All of the Christmas Things

All of the Christmas Things

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Our kids GREW UP over the last few years. Covid did a number on the world, throwing us all into a tailspin. We all missed a lot of things, some of them monumental moments. We had to find ways to grieve the loss of life events and expectations we thought were just going to be there.

In ways though, our family felt really lucky. We witnessed so much we normally would have missed. We fell into rhythms together, a sort of choreographed dance we had to learn and practice day after day. There were fights and runs on the treadmill because we could handle the sound of each other anymore. There were also deep discussions and belly laughs. There were daily walks and puzzles. There were creative meals and learning not only what each of us wanted to do but how to bend a little, like dancing.

Stepping away from that and parting ways was tough. We get crabby about schedules and miscommunication and stress. When we get a break and come together – we remember our rhythm.

The holiday break this year felt a little different. We celebrated the holidays early with both extended families and we had a lot of the shopping out of the way. It felt like we had a lot more time to do holiday stuff around town. As the boys are getting older, we felt like we missed a lot of their “last”s. We decided to try to get to as many of our favorite holiday events as possible before the boys didn’t want to do them anymore.

We made December a month full of all the Christmas things. The first weekend, on Friday we attended Champagne and Mistletoe in Ankeny’s Uptown. We have always enjoyed this in the past. This year they expanded it to several weekends and a lot of the shops we tried to visit were closed during the event. It was kind of a bummer. It felt like a small-town gathering in the past with carolers and a horse and trolley ride and reindeer. This time it was a bunch of mostly empty shops and a line of people outside to see a reindeer we could see through the fence. I hope this event picks up with the opening of the new stores, better management (shops should be open), or bringing it back for just one night. It’s difficult to contend with the District at this point.

Saturday morning we went to the Botanical Center to make swags. In the past, these were large door swags or wreaths. They were very tiny this year, but we made some super cute ones and hung them from our windows. We enjoyed them all season and it is always such a fun event. They also served hot cocoa this year. It was really good, the thick kind like they melted a candy bar in a cup – Sammy of course had two, with toppings.

Jeff’s aunt, Cheryl, and cousin, Jeremiah, came to town from Tennessee. We had planned to take them to the Christkindlmarket, but since it was 12 degrees, we decided to stay at the Botanical Center. It turned out they loved the idea and we had a wonderful time discussing plants and hiking, walking around under the humid dome, and eating at one of my favorite lunch spots, Trellis. After a short visit with Jeff’s relatives, they headed out and we were off again too.

Dazzling in the District in Prairie Trail, Ankeny has become a pretty big event. I really enjoy this one. I like walking around the shops there. Nook and Nest and Charlotte Louise Mercantile are two of my favorites. The library is always a fun stop with crafts for holidays around the world and our storytime friends from when the boys were small, who we pop in to see. It’s also a good place to warm up and run into familiar faces before heading out to the tree lighting and fireworks. There’s just something extra magical about Christmas fireworks. It might be their unexpected delight or all the lights on the ground mixed with lights in the sky. Or perhaps it reminds me of the story from Bill Bryson’s Neither Here nor There when the people all come out at midnight on New Year’s Eve and shoot off Fireworks and then go back inside and go to bed. I love that story.

Sunday we decorated the Christmas tree while watching Christmas Eve on Sesame Street. Monday Sam and I had Peppermint Mochas with his reading homework. That evening was one of the scheduling flubs I referenced in a previous post. I told a friend I’d help her with some volunteer work and suddenly realized last minute we had purchased tickets that evening for a drive-through light show. It wasn’t on my calendar.

We all piled in the car and had just enough time to get there. We drove around oohing and aahing the lights. This was one of the things the boys didn’t want to miss. I was glad we made it. My friend and I were still able to split the volunteer duties and Jeff and I put labels on chapsticks watching a Christmas movie late one night. It was perfect. But there is more to this story… this is not yet all of the Christmas things.

Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving

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Sammy was sick a lot as a baby. He had an incessant cough and was constantly fighting a runny nose. He had asthma. Countless times I had to clear mucus from his throat because he was having trouble getting a breath. I got scared a lot. He had RSV a couple of times. He had pneumonia. We had x-rays done on his tiny chest and prednisone and spent a lot of time on the nebulizer with albuterol treatments.

Ben had asthma and a couple of bouts with the nebulizer, but being an only child for quite a while and somehow inheriting his father’s Ironman-Esque immune system, he was rarely sick. We called the nebulizer his Buzz Lightyear mask. Treatments made him tired and he’d fall asleep in my lap breathing in the medicine. Sammy fought that thing covering his face, he hated it and it was so frequent. We often weren’t prepared for the many differences between the boys.

Sam also isn’t a great sleeper. His nighttime sleep isn’t restful. He wriggles and is a very light and short sleeper. His naps only ever happened when he was moving: stroller, bike seat, or car seat. Not a great way to boost that immune system.

His immune system still isn’t great. I don’t know if you truly inherit immunity, but if he did, he got mine. I don’t know if it’s affected by having an older sibling who is exposed and brings stuff home when a child is younger and whose body isn’t ready for it yet – Sam and I are both second children. I could throw out a lot of theories, but the fact is, Sammy gets sick and when he does, it’s really sick. Twice just in November, he got sick and both times his fever reached and sustained a temperature of 104. It’s hard as a parent to know what to do. You put them in the tub, alternate medicine, give them liquids, take covid tests, and call the nurse. You know they’ll get better, but you sit there just kind of helpless trying to go about your day.

The last time Sam got sick, we were supposed to be on our way to Colorado. We had been planning this trip for about 6 months. We had new a niece and a new nephew born this year and were excited to go out to spend the holidays together – the whole Wright family. We also had given Ben a gift to go to Convergence Station and wanted to spend the day there on the way. We’ve been trying to get to the Meow Wolfs for a few years now.

But Sammy was burning up and while we had seen him recover quickly with rest before, we had also seen him overdo it and take a bad turn. He has spent a lot of holidays trying to participate and making it much worse for himself (I’m looking at you two Christmases with vomit on the floor and one 4th of July with a drive that took twice as long to get home and ended with vomit on the dog…)

We decided to try to adjust. Nothing new with our travels. Adjusting is the name of the game. We had a built-in overnight in Nebraska to ease the drive and get an early start for Convergence Station. We cut out the overnight and Convergence Station – promising to get there ASAP. We would have to see how Sam felt with an extra day of rest. We would see if he would be well enough for a day of rest in the car (on top of everything else, Sam has acid reflux that activates his motion sickness, especially when he is sick).

We were not always good at adjusting. We had to learn this. Pivoting when Jeff’s come down after his law school graduation, the bar exam, and the results of passing finally all slammed into him and we had to postpone our trip a day. Changing plans for our honeymoon when our plane was struck by lightning and we were stuck in the airport for 8 hours with no information but an announcement every 30-60 minutes saying it would be “soon”. We ended up with two honeymoons by renting a car to Spring Green, WI, and making phone calls on the way to get a travel voucher to go to Disney World a few months later. Getting our car broken into and our things stolen in St. Louis, we had to pivot. We found a place that could fix our window in a short time, called our insurance agent to start a claim, purchased the necessities, and continued our trip. We were resolved to appreciate the time we had and the plans we made. We handled the remainder of the logistics when we arrived home.

There have been literally a million hiccups like this in life and our travels. We’ve had to pause, take a breath, decide together what is important, and how we can facilitate that. In this instance, our priorities were Sam getting better and then seeing the family. We let everyone know he was sick since they would be exposed. They seemed most concerned about the time we would be there, so we let them know we were doing our best and worked on getting Sam the rest he needed.

As you may guess, Sam was up for the drive. It was a quick trip. It was good to see the family. It was so nice to finally meet our little niece, Winnie. She is adorable. Her eyes are wide and alert. I got to rock her to sleep a couple of times. Our nephew is so fun to play with. His laugh is infectious. He smiles and eats everything and has a sunny disposition. I always love hanging out with our nieces. Spending time with them is one of those things that just feels like home. I like catching up in person and getting to hear their stories and laughing together. Watching them grow is one of life’s joys.

We ate a big delicious meal, spent time playing and talking, and we headed back. Sam made a full recovery in the mountain air.

We made it home in time to celebrate Jeff’s birthday. We ice skated which Jeff and Sam are apparently pros at and Ben and I can kind of do. The boys made brookies for Jeff’s birthday “cake”. We spent time together as a family, adjusting our ideas of the way things should be. Thankful for our time together.

There’s no knowing where you might be swept off to…

There’s no knowing where you might be swept off to…

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As soon as Jeff and I started feeling better, November started its upswing of busyness. The schools seem to try to squeeze in a little of everything right at the end of the semester just when social lives are packed with extra holiday activity. It starts to feel like Bilbo Baggins says, “It’s a dangerous business, Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road, and if you don’t keep your feet, there’s no knowing where you might be swept off to.” I love this line. It is simultaneously a warning and an optimistic wink at adventure – the foreboding of a Baggins and the glee of a Took. And, on both sides of this, we were carried away in the delight of it all and found ourselves somewhat overwhelmed by a hectic pace.

Each of us, on different occasions, found ourself in the wrong place at the wrong time, despite our thorough scheduling and communication. It became a bit of a joke. None-the-less we were beginning to find ourselves in a holiday mood and preparing for the season.

Sam was wrapping up another phase of baseball with HitTrax ending – next up is batting with friends from Little League at some cages and in our garage, and strength training for pitching. He also started basketball with Jeff as assistant coach.

We were able to see Ben perform in a bass clef choir concert. He is one of the lowest voices in the choir. He found out right before Christmas break he will be in Honor Choir again this year. We are very proud of him, his vocal practice, and discipline to improve and learn. We are also looking forward with much anticipation to the upcoming Show Choir season.

Ben had a band concert as well. This was especially exciting for us, because he started playing a new instrument recently. Ben has been playing clarinet since the 5th grade. This year his band instructor requested he try the bass clarinet. He was getting a bit bored with playing the same thing, and showing an aptitude for instrumental music. The instructor felt he could adjust well. It takes a lot of breath to play the bass clarinet and he felt Ben could handle it. It also takes someone tall and strong – it’s a big instrument, Ben fit the bill. He loves it and took to it right away. He can practice his regular clarinet at home since the fingering is the same, so the bass clarinet stays at school. This was his debut! It was fun for us to watch.

Our weekend ended at my parents’ house, they flew back for my niece’s and nephew’s birthdays in Michigan and to share a holiday with us. We spent Sunday afternoon having a meal, playing games, and exchanging gifts. It was our Thanksgiving and Christmas all rolled into one. Sammy was feeling sick so we made it pretty low-key, but it was a good visit and holiday. We had a nice time and I am super excited to take my new waterproof hiking boots on our adventures.

November is for birthdays

November is for birthdays

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When I was little I felt it was a big deal for kids to have “birthday buddies”. I think there were a lot of kids my age who had birthday parties together, or who were really excited about sharing a birthday month. I was good friends with twins so it may have been a ploy by their parents to make their birthdays seem special. Who knows? But the month of November is cold and boring – seriously from the highs of Halloween to that moment when Thanksgiving hits and we all jump on the party train chugging along all the way to Christmas and New Year’s Eve, there’s a pretty low spot in November. It felt lame as a kid. I was the lone birthday in the cold, dry November wasteland between holidays. The one little bright spot: it always seemed to snow on (or very close to) my birthday.

As I got older, sharing a birthday seemed much less of a priority – sort of like how often we thought we’d run into earthquakes and quicksand. As our family grew and extended, it seemed more and more November birthdays were added to the list. I now get to celebrate the month with so many family members, I almost forget my birthday is in there sometimes – and I still often get my snow.

This year, we were still getting over covid symptoms so I chose a pretty low-key celebration. We had breakfast at La Mie, my favorite little French bakery in Des Moines. Ben had show choir choreography camp all day. So, Sam, Jeff, and I spent a little time breathing in the warm, fresh, earthy-scented air of the Botanical Center. I love just walking around that place when I need some rejuvenation.

In the evening, Jeff baked me a chocolate cake while I face-timed with the girls and was serenaded with a birthday song by their beautiful voices including Sam taking the low notes. I played Stick Fight with my guys and heard from lots of friends and family. It was a quiet day, shared with people I love, in a month celebrating lots of lives I care about – and I got my birthday snow.

The time we got covid

The time we got covid

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The morning of October 31st we woke to messages from Jeff’s employees. Several weren’t coming to work. Covid had hit the office. Jeff and I had been fighting some allergy symptoms and soreness from a new workout but felt pretty good. We thought it would be best to test. We were both positive.

In March 2020, Jeff and I were in Washington DC at one of his work conferences. When we landed, we started hearing inklings that some things were being canceled due to Covid spreading in the US. We had been hearing about the slow spread overseas from China for months. The first cases in the US were recent and contained. We knew traveling to DC may be a bit dicey by the time we got closer to the trip but we had no idea what this virus was at the time and we were still sort of shrugging off whether it was even going to be a thing. After turning on our phones at the airport, the look on Jeff’s face told me it was going to be something bigger than we imagined.

The governor’s chief legal counsel, political counsel, and the director of public health are our friends. They were all calling, texting, and debating whether we should just turn around and come back. We decided to stay and see what happened. We spent our time between work and school, visiting museums and diners as the clouds of the pandemic slowly formed. The news started reporting small cancellations. Basketball games may not be played. It wasn’t a sure thing, but a consideration. Crowds began to thin. The restaurants were a little emptier each day. Until the last day when I went to the National Museum of Women in the Arts. There were security guards on each floor. One offered me a private tour, telling me about each piece and why he came to work there. I saw no other guests. It was just me.

Strangely, at the same time, we were staying at the Renaissance Hotel downtown which was under construction in the basement. We were warned by some of our fellow attendees they found mice in the conference room due to the construction. We sat at the hotel bar for dinner one night listening nervously as the bartender told us a story about an event he worked that was a superspreader for the elite in Washington. Getting ready for bed that night exhausted and trying to pack, I found a family of mice under the dresser in our hotel room. It felt like the world was somehow turning upside down. We were rattled, changing rooms, constantly trying to make sure our flight home wasn’t being canceled. If it was, would there be buses? If there were would they be full? Would the rental cars be gone? How would we get back to our children? Those clouds were a storm and it was here. I could feel the electricity in the air. The tension was palpable.

Our flight home was a race to airport gates and airplanes full of nervous passengers guessing at how to take care of this unknown virus. There was kindness then, passing wet wipes to one another to clean seats. “Bless you”s when people sneezed instead of vitriol and divisiveness. That came later. Leadership didn’t help the practice of loving-kindness.

That was when we stopped. We got home, hugged the grandparents, and they left. We went out to eat one last breakfast. We stopped at a shop. Ben had a babysitting class and then the world shut down. We tried to solve it. For two years we tried to make it better. We walked every day and were on school boards making decisions and were skyping scientists and were studying history and were reading and were zoom calling classes and teachers and were fighting for laws to make better court systems and fosters systems and rowed and ran and lifted and trained dogs and lived. We survived just like everyone else. We tried to stop the world from burning with our garden hoses.

After nearly three years and all the vaccines, we stopped. We rested. We let down our guards a little. We never got covid. We never got anything. We wore masks and washed our hands religiously for nearly three years. The new booster came out for Omicron and we didn’t get it right away. We got covid. The thing we had hidden from, avoided, and tried to save others from for nearly three years. We didn’t know if the boys already had it. They never tested positive after us. They likely had it before us and we had no idea. Guilt washed over me when I realized that.

I got the antiviral. Jeff didn’t. His symptoms came and went like a light breeze within a couple of days. My covid symptoms lasted two and half weeks and took my breath away every time I tried to do anything as if to say “you will rest, you have no choice in the matter.” I am a shit patient. I do not rest. I hate it. I still got up to get the kids ready for school every morning. I still made dinner, with help, each night and attempted to do things around the house. When I tried doing yard work one afternoon and everything went black, bending double trying to breathe, I got the hint to sit down for a while. I couldn’t focus so I read a lot. It was good for me. But I also hated it. It felt like the nearly three years of using a garden hose on a burning world all over again.

I got a sinus infection after covid. I haven’t actually felt the same since I had it. I’m still tired and congested. In a way though, it wasn’t what I was fearing. I don’t believe I passed it to anyone – as soon as we found out we started quarantine. We didn’t lose our sense of smell or taste. We didn’t have any long-lasting conditions of the heart or lungs so far as I can tell – there is asthma in my family and the boys had it when they were small. I chalk a lot of this up to the fact that we had our first few vaccines and that we are in generally good health – we eat well, exercise regularly, try to get consistent sleep, and take care of our mental health.

For nearly three years, we stayed tethered to our houses. We all watched as the world burned. We tried our best to put it out in our own ways, keep our houses from burning, keep the world from burning, keep others from burning – when all we were equipped with was a garden hose. After nearly three years, it may be time to use our hoses to water our plants again.

All Hallow’s Eve – Samhain

All Hallow’s Eve – Samhain

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I’ve been a little behind on posting. Our family was sick. We are better now, I hope. Sammy has a cough again. It seems Sammy has had a cough off and on since he was born, however, so we will see where we end up. But when I say we were sick, I mean covid. I mean putting Sammy in the tub with 104 temp and alternating Tylenol and Ibuprofen and this cycling. I mean him vomiting and coughing. I mean I had trouble breathing and blacking out. I mean even Jeff had to lie down for a few days. It’s funny in a way the first couple of days, I felt pretty good. I turned to Jeff and said, “I’m not going to let this take me. I want to keep working out” (we had just really started getting into a good rhythm) “I want to keep working.” (I was getting ready to start NaNoWriMo and hadn’t told anyone and I thought working with a testing website which has turned into technical difficulties). As we know now, no one beats this, it stops everyone who gets it. Rest is a necessity and as people liked to remind me while I was going through it, I am not so young anymore. I am actually not that old, but apparently old enough to get hit hard with this.

The weekend before Halloween, we were in full celebration mode. I love Halloween. I love costumes and scary movies. I love the history of the holiday and the way the dark side of people comes out. There seems to be a lot of nostalgia around Halloween lately, I point toward the direction of Stranger Things on this one. I enjoy that aspect, a reminder of the goblins of my youth.

Ben had Show Choir that Saturday so we had a Sammy day and took him to Trick or Trees at the Botanical Center. Last year it was at night which was spooky and fun. My favorite events there are at night. The dark gives the place a totally different feel when they use lighting and music for ambiance. It plays off the plants and trees in such a compelling way. With the event during the day, however, they added an element of indoor and outdoor entertainment. They had representatives from places like the zoo and landscapers educating the kids on plant life in different aspects of their environment with a Halloween theme (and treats!). There was a fire juggler, plant trivia stands, a live scarecrow on stilts, and fun photo opportunities. It was a great day at the Botanical Center – we are really enjoying our membership this year!

That evening, Jeff and I were invited to celebrate the 50th anniversary of the Drake Legal Clinic. We had a nice dinner on campus. We apparently scored sitting at the fun table (helped to make it the fun table?) So, we had a pretty great time, laughing and talking with the people around us. It was nice to celebrate a place that helped Jeff when we was first starting out and now he gets to help by partnering with and setting up a new wrongful convictions unit with them.

Sunday morning we carved our pumpkins – they were of course each unique to our personalities and gorgeous in their own right. Then we were off for Sammy’s HitTrax game. If you haven’t seen a HitTrax baseball game it’s a fun experience – it’s like playing a videogame in the batting cages. You hit the baseball, it tracks it, and then sends the runner and fielders into action on the screen. It’s like the golf simulator but with a baseball team playing against another baseball team trying to score runs.

In our area, not our state, just the region we live in, there is something called Beggars’ Night. The night before Halloween is when everyone Trick or Treats and they tell jokes for their candy. I grew up in two different parts of Iowa than this one. Neither of those places did this. We Trick or Treated on Halloween, sans jokes. But here we are, in this strange place, teaching our kids strange traditions. I have to admit it is kind of fun. It got really quirky during covid to yell out the jokes and have the candy come down clever shoots or catapults or whatever odd way people were finding to launch candy across the socially distanced gap. Sunday night our boys dressed up in their homemade costumes. They thought them up. I purchased the materials and Jeff and I put them together. It was a family affair. Coincidentally and totally undiscussed, the boys each separately chose to be Charlie Brown. Sam was Baseball Charlie Brown, from the comic books he’s been reading lately. Ben was Charlie Brown dressed as a ghost for Halloween from the beloved by us, It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown movie. We went around our neighborhood with the boys, then Ben went off with a friend while one of Sam’s friends and his mom who is a great friend of mine came to join us for some more neighborhoods in our area. It was a gorgeous night. We were able to walk the streets in sweaters. The houses were so well decorated, some with lights and pumpkins, others like haunted, zombie-infested prisons. It was scary how amazingly well done the latter were. The boys ran along arguing about who had the most candy and who could beat the other to the next doorstep while the parents talked about how beautiful this moment in time was. I wish could have bottled that night up for those kids. I hope it’s one that sticks in their memories.

We parted ways and ate dinner, watched Charlie Brown as is tradition. The kids went to bed with bellies full of candy and heads full of wonderful memories.

But as this post started with illness, so it ends. The morning of Halloween Jeff and I woke up feeling not so great. We both had been feeling like maybe our allergies had been bothering us (it’s fall, all the things are floating in the air!) and we were a bit sore from those workouts, no big deal. Then, people started calling into work sick one after the other, all testing positive for covid. I grabbed the tests from the closet we’d been stockpiling for a while. Jeff and I both tested positive. The boys were negative. They were off to school. We were off to the couch. We felt fine. But that wasn’t the end of that story.

Fall Break

Fall Break

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I think our school district is experimenting. Not weirdly, just trying out some new things. They’ve not been the most progressive so any little thing seems like kind of a big deal. We live in a historically conservative town. This year one of the changes has been messing with the school calendar. So, we had a fall break. We’ve always had Columbus/Indigenous People’s Day off, which we didn’t actually have this year. Instead, we had a four-day weekend. And it was pretty funny the way some families treated this like it was Spring Break. I get it, it was unexpected time off without the added expenses of “travel season” (see: summer, holidays, spring break price hikes) but the elaborate vacations parents took were pretty funny. It was four days, and to be honest, we weren’t really on our game with this one. It came up and we were like, “huh. we have extra days off of school…” It really hadn’t been that long since we’d taken our last trip so we stayed home and did a couple of things around town.

Our first stop was harvesting the garden and breaks between adventures meant figuring out what to do with all of the vegetables. Squash was easily stored. Sam helped me chop peppers for the freezer. We made applesauce from the neighbors’ apples. Soups and sauces were made from tomatoes and the extras were frozen. Plums were made into jam. A lot of cucumbers were given away (I don’t think we will do cucumbers again). Pumpkins were put out on the front porch.

The boys liked the thought of a day just getting coffee and going to the shops so on Friday, we headed to Smokey Row, the library, and a couple of shops in the District. Ben recently joined a board game club at school and learned there were new game stores in town we should check out. We are all big fans of games so we headed over to a game store that just opened in Uptown. It was still being set up but had a lot of retro video games and comic books, a few board games. The boys thought they’d like to come back with their dad. I just started playing video games in the last year. I wasn’t allowed to as a kid and was disinterested as an adult until my kids showed me how. Still, mostly all I play now is Stick Fight and games on the Oculus.

Our next stop was our best stop. We ended up at a store called Dungeons Gate. When we walked in the first thing I saw was “New Fiction”. It was a lot of YA and Adult books that made my little readerly heart flutter. After sifting through books for a bit, I looked up to begin drooling over their immense board game collection. They have many of our favorites, but also tons of titles like them and even more, we hadn’t heard or dreamt of. We are amateurs despite the fact that we have a towering collection. There is a shop dog which let’s be honest makes me fall in love with any shop. The owners are a married couple, she used to practice law, I don’t know what he did prior to this, but they are both nerds at heart. They patiently and enthusiastically explained the games to us we were interested in, letting us know we could try them out now or on their Tuesday game nights. There were rows of fancy dice, inks, and great books. They have excellent taste in music (by this I mean they were listening to Cake and Foo Fighters) and they were planning a game party with a taco truck. I kind of wanted them to adopt me. We will definitely be patronizing this store a lot more often.

The next morning we spent some time enjoying fall in our backyard. We worked on a few things that needed to get done, but we also just enjoyed the weather, the leaves changing, and our new additions to the yard. In the evening we had tickets to Night Eyes at the zoo. We have been members, frequent zoo goers, program participants, and donors for years, but this was always one event we missed. This year we decided to check it out. We found tickets for a good price. The boys are at that age between not wanting to participate in the usual stuff and within that space of feeling like it’s starting to get too late to catch some of these things we jumped on this one. Night Eyes is insane. There was a traffic jam for several blocks to get into the zoo. We parked in a place I didn’t even know existed and though we had tickets we stood in a line that wrapped around most of the main parking lot. The walk was easy, the weather was beautiful, the costumes entertaining, and the workers efficient – so please don’t misunderstand me, it was pleasant as far as waiting goes. It just took us by surprise how many people were there. Craziness. Between the number of people and our inability to see pretty much any animals – I can understand the few we saw sleeping, but I can not understand the areas that were locked or the animals that were put away, why?- I doubt we will do this event again, but we had a nice time walking, and talking, Sam collected candy, there were some odd Halloween lights and decorations, random characters running around, and as I said, the costumes were entertaining. We ended the night with a rare dinner out. We don’t do this often these days and Latin King’s patio on a warm October evening felt perfect.

Sunday brought us another beautiful morning for drinking coffee on the patio. The dogs enjoyed running in the backyard together. Sunday afternoon was perfect for a baseball game in the park. Sam’s fall practice team coached by Jeff scrimmaged with a USSSA team while Ben and I watched, cheered, and walked through the leaves.

Monday brought rain, wind, and cold. So, while Ben headed to the library to make candy sushi, Sam and I headed to Petsmart to look at the animals, JoAnns to pick up some parts for the boys’ costumes, and to Target for Starbucks, and to mess around. Sam and I found a chinchilla we both wanted to adopt – along with two kittens, a hamster, and several fish. We decided our dogs would probably torture all of these things trying to play with them and thought better of it. He found a furry pillow, a lovely lounging bench, some books, and several blankets (could he be any more my kid?).

It was a good fall break. I don’t know if we will get another or if we would spend it the same, but it was nice to have the extra time together and to spend it relaxing.

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